The #1 Way to Deal With The Job You Hate (No Sugarcoating The Pill)

The #1 Way to Deal With The Job You Hate (No Sugarcoating The Pill)

When almost everybody else is trying to sugarcoat the pill when it comes to dealing with the job you hate, I am going to be brutally honest with you…

Working a job you hate is like having cancer…

If you don’t find a way to deal with it ASAP chances are that it will ruin your entire life.

And just like with cancer, the best way to deal with the job you hate is to remove it from your life altogether sooner than later.

However, this ain’t an easy task.

But not being easy doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s impossible as many people tend to believe.

During the last 3 years, I’ve managed to successfully remove not one, but two tumor-like jobs I hated from my life and let me assure you that it’s not nearly as scary as most people think… And since I was able to pull this off, you can definitely do it too!

How?

Keep reading!

 

Dealing With The Job You Hate Without Sugarcoating The Pill

1 • Assume Responsibility

You Fail all the Time... But You Arent a Failure Until You Start Blaming Someone Else. - Bum Phillips

Blaming others is the easiest way out of acting towards changing what’s going wrong in our lives for the better.

Yes, it’s probably not your fault that your boss is a dickhead, your colleagues discriminate against you, your clients yell at you, your workload is unmanageable or that your commute is so long that it’s ruining your entire day…

BUT it’s definitely YOUR fault that you keep returning to all this crap you hate day after day.

Nobody forced you into working your terrible job. Nobody is forcing you to keep going back there.

Every day when you get out of bed, you have a choice… You could start getting ready for work or you could prepare your breakfast, eat it peacefully at your own pace, take a shower, go back to bed, and never set your foot at that job you hate ever again.

Or if you are not a psycho just like me, quitting your job without having anything else lined up, you could follow another safer course of action.

Instead of vegging in front of your TV or taking a nap or going out for drinks or scrolling up and down your Facebook feed for 5 hours after you get back from work, you could choose to devote some time and energy towards finding another way to earn your living.

It’s YOUR choice!

Yes, it can be difficult to completely redesign your career, start attending night classes or seminars, beginning a side hustle or attending dozens of job interviews while at the same time holding down a 9-5, exhausting job.

But you CAN make a choice to do whatever it takes towards improving your employment status forever.

Assume responsibility for everything going wrong in your life, even if you believe that it’s not your fault. This is the only way to regain your power as a creator, start correcting the crap out of every single one of your shortcomings and eventually end up living a life shaped according to your liking…

Nobody is the victim of their circumstances but rather their creator… Even if you have been dealt a horrible hand, you can still turn it around and win!

Your circumstances are a reflection of your choices.

Choose wisely!

 

Note: Parts of this section were inspired by the article The Secret to Successfully Dealing With a Job You Hate (That Almost No One Ever Uses).

 

2 • Start Saving Money

I know that I must have started sounding like a broken record here but one of the most important things you could possibly do when you hate your job is to start setting some money aside.

Having a substantial financial cushion on the side is going to make the process of dealing with your job a whole lot easier and much less stressful.

Being in a place of not having money to pay the bills is going to result in making decisions out of necessity and fear and those decisions are never going to be in favor of actually improving your situation in the long-term…

I am sure than right now climbing Everest might seem more achievable to you than setting money aside but believe me it’s really not that hard… It just takes some time until you have a significant amount saved.

The trick?

STOP BUYING CRAP YOU DON’T NEED!!!

This includes anything, from ordering takeout every single night to purchasing expensive clothes, shoes, or the latest gadgets…

This is all I did and I managed to save almost a year’s worth of expenses in less than one and a half year.

That simple.

 

3 • Stop Complaining

Venting feels awesome right?

After unloading all the negativity inside your head on those who happen to be around you just like a garbage truck unloads all its trash in a dump, you feel like an enormous weight has been lifted off your shoulders.

The bad news is that despite complaining about your job might indeed improve your mood for a while, sooner or later you’ll have to return to that job you hate and you’ll be back to square one, sad and miserable, once again.

The worse news is that too much complaining about your job just robs you from the energy that you could otherwise invest in actually dealing with it.

The more you keep complaining about your job, the less likely it’ll be to actually start doing what’s necessary to fix it.

If only our problems could be solved by complaining about them right?

Unfortunately, this isn’t how things work…

If you want to successfully deal with the job you hate once and for all, you have to stop acting like it’s not your fault, playing the victim and complaining about it 24/7 and instead redirect all that excess time and energy towards actively improving the situation yourself until you have nothing more to complain about.

 

4 • Embrace Impermanence

In this life, nothing is permanent and guess what!

Your job is one of these nothings…

The average worker no longer has just one career. According to the Atlantic Canada Opportunities Agency, a group that tracks economic trends, the number of careers a worker can expect to have in a lifetime is five — and growing. Changing your job every few years has become common practice, so you shouldn’t think that a few years here and a few years there is a warning sign on your resume. – askmen.com

Either you want it or not at some point your job is going to end one way or another. The company might go bankrupt or relocate, there might be a need for cutbacks and you happen to be one of those people who had to be fired, they might fire you for poor performance (working a job you hate dramatically decreases your performance), or you get drunk Saturday night, call your boss, quit, and then wake up the next day having no recollection of the incident whatsoever.

Your job is NOT permanent, no matter how permanent it might be feeling right now, get that very well in your head!

This is both good and bad news!

The good news is that you probably won’t have to keep working the job you hate until you are old enough to retire (if you live that long).

The bad news is that you are wasting your years working a job you hate which might sooner or later reject you like a bad transplant.

And then what?

You’ll be forced to start looking for another job anyway…

Yeah, no job is really safe and secure but wouldn’t you be better off not being safe and secure working a job you don’t hate or even one you actually enjoy?

Plus, wouldn’t it be much better to start considering your alternatives now that you actually have a job instead of waiting until you are under tremendous amounts of pressure because someone decided to cut your current source of income short and you are in dire need of money to put food on your table and pay the bills?

5 • Start a Side Hustle to Eventually Replace Your Current Income

15 Ways to Replace Your Income In Order to Quit Your JobI know that when it comes to quitting a job, the first thing that comes to mind is going for another better job right?

While this is the mainstream course of action, it’s not the only solid course of action.

In fact, nowadays, more and more people begin hustles which offer the potential to eventually produce a full-time income for them on the side of their 9-5 jobs.

A side-hustle is not just about making more money but rather about building something of substance, around one of your interests or passions, which could also eventually help you escape from the shackles of the 9-5 forever without having to leave your job like right now.

According to a Bankrate study, about 37% of adults in the U.S. have a side hustle. And most of them pay pretty well, at an average of nearly $700 a month!

Maybe you want to start a podcast sharing your thoughts with the world, create a blog, become a web designer or a yoga instructor.

Whatever the case, going for it at the side of your job is a great way to experiment with your idea without having to come face to face with the fear and stress of not having money to cover your expenses.

For instance, this website has been my side hustle for a little more than a year now and despite the fact that I am currently unemployed because I quit my last job without having anything lined up (oops), I am probably going to start looking for another job shortly, because the income my online business brings in right now is simply not enough to sustain me just yet.

Anyway, to get some side-hustle ideas, go ahead and check out those 15 Ways To Replace Your Income In Order To Quit Your Job In 2019.

 

6 • Never Settle

There is no passion to be found in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living. - Nelson Mandela

Let me tell you a little story…

I was working for 2 years in the customer service department of a very large international company along with 50 other people… Almost every single one of them hated that job as much as I did, some of them even more!

The company was not that bad but the duties were awful.

We had to deal with hundreds of angry, verbally abusive customers daily. The workload was so huge and unmanageable that we didn’t even have the freedom to go to the toilet not to mention that we had to multitask so much that at the end of the day our brains were so fucked up that we couldn’t even talk to each other…

Anyway, despite everybody hated every single bit of that job, almost all of them had completely settled for it…

There were people who hadn’t even considered trying to do something better with their lives. Others had attempted to find their way out in the past but they’ve failed and given up. A couple of them got a degree in another field by attending remote, night classes but they never actually used it for something else besides whipping the sweat of their forehead while apologizing to angry customers for mistakes they didn’t even make.

The moment I announced that I was leaving that job, everyone’s jaw dropped to the ground; they were all stunned! They kept telling me that they were so jealous of me and that they wished they could go back in time and work harder to find their way out just as I did.

I was able to see the regret in their eyes… I could hear the regret in their voices… I could even smell it on them!

Please don’t be one of those people.

Never settle for anything less than you want. Keep taking action until you reach your goals… Sure, things could go wrong… You might fail, and not just once. But the possibility of living a better life is worth all the trouble, failures, and frustrations…

Mark my words that the chances of regretting leaving the job you hate are way, WAY less than the chances of regretting that you settled for it, never giving yourself a chance to be happier with what you do for a living.

 

7 • Stop Trying to Sugarcoat the Pill

If you’ve already read a couple of articles on dealing with the job you hate before landing on my own, I am sure that you’ll have noticed that the majority of them keep suggesting stuff such as thinking positive about your job or trying to see the bright side or whatever…

That’s bad advice!

First of all, let me tell you first hand that unhating a job you’ve already grown to hate is impossible… Believe me, I’ve tried. Yes, focusing on the “positive” aspects of your job might help you regulate your negative feelings towards it for like a couple of seconds, but sooner or later, they will intensify again!

Working an awful job is like being in an abusive relationship… You could try to think positively about it all you want but that doesn’t change the fact that your partner is going to keep abusing you until you remove them from your life once and for all.

Let me assure you that trying to condition yourself to think positively about bad situations in order to avoid taking action to change them because you don’t know how or because you are scared of the unknown or due to any other reason, is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.

The negative feelings towards your job exist for a reason; to make you realize that the situation is not serving you and that you need to take action to improve it.

Don’t try to mask them with fake positivity as an excuse to stay put… Use them as motivation to improve your life and get what you want.

Do you know how lobsters grow?

A lobster is a soft mushy animal that lives inside a rigid shell. That rigid shell does not actually expand as the lobster grows inside it so it eventually becomes very confining and the lobster starts feeling under pressure and uncomfortable.

Once this happens, it goes under a rock formation to protect itself from predatory fish, casts off its shell and produces a new one. During its lifetime, the lobster repeats this process numerous times.

The stimulus for the lobster to grow is the feeling of being uncomfortable! If the lobster tried to beat this uncomfortable feeling by trying to think positive about it, it would never actually grow.

 

8 • Reduce Your Working Hours

One of the best actions I took while being in a job I hated was cutting my working hours in half.

Let me tell you that working a job you hate for 4 hours instead of 8+ could make that job much more tolerable in many ways.

Think about it… Time will pass faster and you’ll be doing things you hate for fewer hours.

Once you get to your job tomorrow do a little experiment… Set an alarm clock in 4 hours from the time your shift begins and when it goes off imagine that this would be the time that you’ll start heading home.

How did this make you feel? Multiply this feeling by 10 and you’ll understand how being a part-time worker at your job actually feels like.

Becoming a part-timer could change your entire perspective towards your job. You might even start liking it!

In addition, working part-time will result in having more time, energy, and clarity to act towards completely eliminating your job without compromising your “security” until that happens.

For instance, becoming a part-time worker made my job hunt a lot easier and much smoother. I was able to schedule more interviews during a day and I wasn’t depleted while attending them. Furthermore, I started devoting much more time and energy towards other things that are of great significance to me such as growing my online business, reading books, meditating, and working out.

Yes, I had to cut back some luxuries like buying random stuff or going out for drinks every Friday, Saturday, and Sunday night but to achieve any substantial goal requires sacrifices.

Lastly, I realized that I could easily survive by earning less money and that gave me the extra push I needed to actually take another job that paid less money but was much more tolerable than the one I already had.

“It’s helped me gain perspective and to be less fearful, knowing I would survive if I left the job as I’m already OK with far less money. It’s increased my physical and psychological energy, for sure. I have more space to pursue other things, and a feeling of already having one foot out of the door. – careershifters.org

 

Conclusion

For me, there’s only one true way towards successfully dealing with a job you hate and that’s leaving it sooner or later…

No job is permanent so at some point, you might have to leave it anyway, either you want it or not so there’s no point in sticking it out.

Take responsibility for your bad situation and start doing what’s necessary to improve it. Stop complaining, start saving money, and devote as much free time and energy you have to plan your way out either this is finding another job or going for a side-hustle.

Do whatever it takes and never settle for less than what you want deserve.

Going part-time at your current job might smooth things out a lot more than you think.

Personally, I have tried being grateful or accepting the situation or focusing on the lessons or trying to see the positive side, but at the end of the day, I couldn’t shake off the feeling that staying in a job I hated was just a waste of my life.

At the end of the day, why even bother wasting so much time and energy trying to convince yourself to stay in a job you hate when you could as well invest it towards finding a better job or acquiring a new skillset in order to make a career shift or start a side hustle which would allow you to eventually become your own boss?

There’s just no point…

 

  • For how long have you been working that job you hate?
  • Have you tried dealing with it in a way I didn’t mention in my article?
  • If yes, how?
  • Were you successful in dealing with it or not?

Let us know all about your opinion and experience in the comments below.

 

If you have any questions or need any further help or guidance from me, I encourage you to email me at xaric@dearboss-iquit.com or drop me a PM on my Wealthy Affiliate Profile.

Whatever the case, I will get back to you as soon as possible.

My best regards to you,

Xaric,
dearboss-iquit.com

This Post Has 22 Comments

  1. When you’re tired of what you don’t like the best option is to opted out and devote some time and energy towards finding another way to earn your living really touched me. I love what the writer said about assume responsibility for everything going wrong in your life. Most of us find it difficult to assume responsibility because of the fear of unknown. Is better to face our fear and end up living a life shaped according to our liking. Thanks for sharing. 

    1. Thank you for taking the time to read this and leave a comment 🙂

      Xaric

  2. It’s true that more often than not we blame others for the negative things that happen. I agree that you have to be accountable for all your actions. It’s your decision and your choice why you are at a job you hate or why you are in debt. It’s not the government’s fault or your family’s fault.

    Someone once said, “I am who I am today because of the choices I made yesterday.”

    So what do you need to do? Get yourself to take action, learn from it, and change your approach, then you will create the momentum to achieve the result. 

    All the best! Cheers!

    AJ

    1. Thanks for sharing AJ!

      Loved the quote by the way… I am going to use it at some point!

      Xaric

  3. Been there, done that. I worked in a job that had a toxic environment because of senior managers and executives. I was not the only one to think that. So it was not just me. One of my co-workers said she had enough and suddenly decided to quit without having another job lined up. It may not have been sudden since she never discussed it with anyone.

    I had a side hustle going so I was somewhat prepared to take my online business full-time. But I realized that if I did not leave the job, I would probably die on the job. Just seeing my workplace in the morning was enough to trigger an adrenalin rush that lasted all day. The commute home would seem relatively short since I would crash on the ride home (I used a commuter van service.)

    1. Sometimes, leaving yourself without an income for a while might turn out to be much less stressful than working a job you hate…

      When I was working a job I hated, every morning moments before arriving at work, I was daydreaming about what would happen if I just drove past my job and then calling my manager telling her that I quit.

      Judging from the past tense you are using, I understand that you managed to quit that job you hated right? Are you earning a full-time living online right now?

  4. Every point in this article resonates with my current situation that I have been stuck for years. The only reason I am staying is the pay and that made me feel like a slave to my own salary. I am certainly not getting lesser hours, no new perks whatsoever and the endless job of multitasking that blocks my creativity is killing me inside. 

    You said it right – it’s like cancer, but I am not letting it get to my heart. For the past 5 years, I have been quietly planning my resignation, hustling on a blog that can potentially turn me into a full-time online entrepreneur. I envision so many projects ahead of me and feel empowered by them. 

    For that, I am biting the bullet and pushing forward still. 

    1. I am so sorry to hear that Cathy… 

      However, it sounds like you are doing everything in your hand to eventually get out of there!

      You have assumed responsibility, you’ve taken on a side hustle, and you are not settling.

      Bite the bullet and keep working towards your freedom. Believe it or not, this side hustle of yours might be among the few things that allow you to keep your sanity because it’s your vehicle out of that job you hate.

      I hope that everything unfolds exactly as you have imagined to!

      Xaric

  5. I couldn’t agree more! Life is much too short to be miserable for at least half of your waking existence when there are, for most people, alternatives. It can be difficult, however, to decide when to stick it out in the hope things will get better and when to just walk away. And sometimes it’s difficult to know whether you’re doing the right job but you’re doing it in the wrong place, or whether you are just doing the wrong job. The hardest thing I’ve found to deal with is when you have a job you like but then you get a new boss who makes your life unbearable. Sometimes you just have to be brave and make a change rather than damaging your mental and physical health by sticking at something that isn’t getting better. 

    But I think your point about taking responsibility is the key one here: there’s only one person who can decide whether you’re happy or not, and that’s you. The world of work is very different from when I entered it in 1990 when jobs for life were still the norm. You’re right, we need to embrace change to survive. Thanks for a thought-provoking post.

    1. Everybody has a choice… Even when a thief tells you “Your money or your life”, you are still given a choice. You can either give your money or your life.

      Most of the time, if you hate your job, it’s very unlikely that it will get better by itself without you taking any kind of action… It’s like saying that you hate being fat but you won’t start working out or dieting because your excess weight might get bored and fly off of you by itself.

      Truth is that a bad boss might screw up even what you consider the best job in the world. It’s not by chance that they say that people quit bosses and not jobs. Actually, one of the main reasons I quit my last job was due to very bad management.

      Change is inevitable. And this doesn’t just apply to jobs but in all aspects of one’s life. Embracing change is the only way to survive bad situations and experiences skillfully.

      After all, the one who truly survives is not the strongest one but the one who is the most adaptable to change.

      Thank you for the thought-provoking comment 🙂

      Xaric

  6. O-M-G! I love this post!

    Of course, I’ve shaken off the shackles now but I also used to work in a customer service department of a large multinational company. I had a manager once who would ask another colleague to follow me every time I went to the toilet to see what I was actually doing. Totally relate to you and I also ended up quitting with no other job lined up. It was either that or go insane.

    I needed 11 months after that stint to recover mentally from the exhaustion that came from working insane hours with a creepy boss. Ugh!

    I agree 100% that, in some cases, you just have to operate and get rid of that cancer once and for all.

    I love your quotes too, by the way.

    You might be interested in one of my favourites. It certainly relates to what you’re talking about here – especially the blaming and complaining. Jim Rohn, one of my all-time fave speakers once said, “If you don’t like where you live, move. You’re not a tree.” 😉

    1. Your job sounds a lot like it was in a call center. I know because I was in a call center too 😛 

      God, people who are managing such workplaces are just insane. But I don’t really blame them if you take into account all the shit they’ve heard during their years there.

      Thanks a lot for sharing your story with us and yes, I loved the quote. Jim Rohn is actually one of my favorite motivational speakers.

      My favorite quote of him is “Life itself is a risk… You are not going to get out alive”

      Xaric

  7. I thoroughly enjoyed this article. I could relate to so much of what you said. I can’t even begin to count the number of times I told my boss to kiss my ass and walked out in a blaze of glory! Until reality set in and I was broke. Fortunately (or unfortunately)I usually ended up moving in with my parents. My mother has always been there for me but you’re right about one thing(more so)in particular. Nothing will change unless you get up off your ass and do something to change the situation.

    Blaming may feel good but ultimately we have no one to blame except ourselves. We need to grow up and accept responsibility for past and future decisions if we are to have peace of mind, heart and soul. 

    The only thing we really control is ourselves and the choices we make. So we need to start making choices to better our lives instead of wallowing in self pity and blame for things we cannot control.

    Thank you. You have re-enforced some of my core beliefs and once again I will pick myself up and go forward making better choices(hopefully)to better my life and financial situation.

    1. Thanks so much for sharing your experience and your tips with us Polly! I am sure that many people will find your words very useful and motivating.

      Truth is, I’ve never considered moving back with my parents but it’s definitely a legit option especially for those who can’t seem to be able to save money for any reason.

      I am glad that you found my article useful and I hope that everything turns out just fine for you 🙂

      Xaric

  8. Hi Xaric

    There is nothing worse than doing a job that you hate, as it is so soul-destroying. Your will to live is so vastly reduced that you will do anything in order to not go to work every day. I really enjoyed reading the 8 points, as they are good suggestions. If you are not willing to change then there is no point complaining about your situation. You need to get off your bum and change your life. 

    The only thing I would add, sometimes it is worth talking to management to see if there is a new role you can take. A change is often good as a rest.

    Thank you,

    Antonio

    1. The 2 years that I stayed in a job I hated were the worst years of my life work-wise. I’ve worked many jobs during my life (I am actually working since I was 14) but there’s not a single job that scarred me as much as this one.

      Thank you very much for your recommendation… Truth is that I have learned not to expect anything from people and that’s why I don’t prefer leaving my well-being on the hands of someone else. I’d rather just leave a job than wait to see if my request for another position is going to be fulfilled.

      Nonetheless, the course of action you suggest could be a legit option for many people and that’s why I actually discuss more about it in my article 4 Ways To Deal With A Job You Hate Like A Pro.

      Thanks a lot for your comment!

      Xaric

  9. Nowadays I think there’s many people doing the work they don’t like, and so sad to tell that i’m one of them, but i never want to settle down, i want to have a new life with a new job, i want to be happy, so when i read this article, it does help me a lot, and i like the way how you deal with it, now saving money and stop complaining are what I’m going to next first, anyway thanks again, I’m gonna share this page to my friends that they might need too

    1. I am glad that I could be of help 🙂

      Never settle for less than what you want to achieve.

      Xaric

  10. Very interesting take on working in a job that you hate. Cutting your hours (if you can afford to) sounds like a smart idea. But, will your employer let that happen? Also, the idea of spending less on unnecessary purchases is very smart, for anyone. I think all of us could benefit from that advice. Overall, very interesting article, thanks, Deanna 

    1. It depends on the employer. 

      4 months before I left my previous job, I went part-time as per my request. This actually helped me get out of the job much faster as I had much more time and energy to look for another job as well as attend interviews.

      Learning to buy only the stuff you really need is not just an idea… It’s a much more conscious way of life which could solve many of the problems our society is currently facing (it has definitely helped me solve a plethora of the problems I used to have).

      I am glad that you found this of value.

      Xaric

  11. Hey Xaric, 

    This is a wonderful article with lots of truth.

    Thanks for not sugar coating anything because I was tired of reading articles saying that I need to start thinking positive and crap.

    I really think you are spot on with the steps you need to take when you are not happy with your job, and how working a job you hate could feel like having cancer. Taking responsibility for our actions is what everyone needs to do to start to see real change in their lives.

    However, it is easier to complain and blame others. I think that is the main reason many people end up stuck doing something they really don’t like. Thanks for providing these tips that anyone can use to make a change.

    Best regards, 

    Jefrey Mihedji

    1. It’s easier to complain and blame others because it takes much less energy than actually acting towards improving our situation. Plus, it makes us feel good almost instantly instead of having to wait until things change. People are always up for a little short-term gratification.

      Thanks for your kind words Jefrey… I hate sugarcoating in general. I am always after the brutal truth no matter how ugly it is. This is the only way to actually learn and evolve. Not with lies and fake promises.

      All the best to you,

      Xaric

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